There seems to be a way, that I descend today,
Far into abyss, something is amiss.
Sold some of the gold, to be somewhat bold
So that I can spend, reasonable end.
But before it's sold, the ore that's named gold
Has fallen again. Striking panic then.
It's a reminder, of the real terror
In 2001, when lost those millions.
Had more than could spend. Was so secure then
Thought impossible, that losses could fall.
10+ Million gone, in a few months long
Now with 10%, I can pay my rent.
As I own my house, and don't spend like louse
Who is so needy, or awful greedy.
I live like peasant, with little presents
That I give myself, and live off the shelf.
But I need new clothes, and a few apples
To make my life go. To let the strife go.
My life Spiritual is like bitter pills,
That I must swallow - So to Trust, Allow.
I can say the words, but delay the cure
Of really to be, without fear / wanting.
I like to be free, financially;
And to stay at home, to play until some
New World does arrive. But can I survive
All this worrying, without curing me?
I lose confidence, of my Wonder's dance.
So I don't Heart Song. Don't do Art too long.
So all the problems, rob Paul's songs again.
And we return to where, were lost with no care.
Where Mom wasn't there. Couldn't listen here.
She didn't know how. Couldn't show love now.
Except in her way: distant with no play.
Just her presence there. Not extended care.
She was a child hurt. Parents never heard
Her expressions too. She never learned to
Listen to her kids or to herself then.
Wasn't possible to know losses pulled
From all of the pain when ignored in shame;
From the fear of more, tears and real horror.
So just the silence. No trust in Love's dance.
That could uncover, family lovers.
It is still the same. But it killed the game.
We can't e're connect. Cannot ever let
The others to know, what Love's missing so.
It is just my fault. Trust locked in a vault
With key thrown away. Can't loan anyway
For I've lost it all. It the cost and fall
Far from pedestal. When then little Paul
Was dad's big hero. The lad tried to go
Way over the hill, before we were killed.
To save family, especially me.
But no one could hear, past their own dark fears.
So they ran away. Soul's Way didn't play.
All our religion, was just word's undone;
In hypocrisy - to sock little me.
But my outer self with successes held
Before everyone, before was undone;
Were just masking all of the pain of Paul.
Who was crying out, with whispers and shouts
To family silent. Trying then to dent
The armor around all our silent clowns
That we kept out there, to keep stress under
The rude breaking point of Truth's earthquake boy.
Who always said too, much of his dead Truth.
Was unpopular. As we lost the war.
Until it was gone. Never any Song.
No real family. Killed by Never Seen.
Never Seen by them. Never Seen even
By near anyone. Couldn't clearly come
To a reckoning. Or Reconciling
To finally be some more family.
So in paradise, where I've finally died
Here in the Nature, where Beauty's so clear;
I find o'er again, Mind-Heart will not blend
As I keep away, weeping's grieving's way.
I hope to break out. Make the dope not cow.
To spiral upward, to more loving world.
But the Shadow knows what the lads oppose;
And it does demand Spirit come undamned.
So the water flows, after laughter goes.
And Maturity, comes to every
Part inside and out. Mind-Body-Heart now
To find Unity. To shine completely.
Heart-Mind to really, find Loving in me.
Clown FamilyNever, Never Seen
by Loveson G. Flower
in artillier at Les Zeribas
6:00 PM Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Photos fm: http://galpano.vision-360.net/data/media/5/V_3clowns.jpg
http://smileclowns.org-images-ca2cast.jpg
